Driving in Victoria B.C. - a MOAN

I have driven in many cities. Toronto and London being two of them. I have been driven in Italy and India, both of which leave you feeling like you are lucky to be alive as you hurl yourself out of the vehicle that was three minutes ago travelling at 1 million miles an hour, kiss the ground and swear you will give your life to Jesus, confess everything and never sin again, as per your very recent, very desperate conversation with Him.

I have seldom, however, driven in a city where, as you come out of your driveway, in order to stay intact, you must assume that everyone in a car today has left their house with an unwavering determination to crash into you. The utter incompetence, pettiness and plain idiocy of drivers in this city leave me thinking that there is no other explanation for their unfathomably terrible driving. 

When I first arrived a year ago, I was so outraged, so baffled, that it took me this long to write about it. I just spent the entire time on the roads shaking my head and throwing my hands in the air with the lunacy of it all. Noone looks or cares though, no matter how much head shaking or hand throwing you manage to execute. They are completely oblivious to anybody except themselves.

I know that part of the problem is that a large percentage of Victoria drivers are among the elderly. ("Nearly dead" from the idiom "Newly wed and nearly dead" that make up Victoria) They can't see, they can't hear, they can hardly reach the brake pedal, and they haven't been found out yet by the driving authorities so they've still, technically, got a right to drive. But they are not the entire problem. I want to add that not all elderly drivers are like this. Plenty of them are more competent than drivers my age. My darling mum, however, is not one of them. Thankfully, she decided to surrender her license after having an operation on one of her eyes that rendered it unusable. 

People turning right onto the road you are barrelling along, kindly wait until you are three millimetres away from them before turning, frenetically, into your lane. You have to brake, but you never beep, because you don't have time. It's all you can do not to bash right into them. Bikers bike without lights, along dark streets, with lots of cars. What kind of a death wish is that? People beep, "helpfully", ALL the time. They beep without having anything to beep about. They beep because they don't like your hairdo. They beep because they're hungry. They are perma-beepers. Beep-aholics. They are not happy if they aren't beeping. It makes me CRAZY. I have had so many visions of hearing someone beep at me, stopping the car, slamming on the handbrake, and marching over to them and saying "what? WHAT? Why did you beep? What POSSIBLE reason do you have to beep at me????" but I know that would just end in more beeping, and possibly some crashes, and the driver of the car would start shouting some gibberish at me in their incomprehensible Canadian accent, and I wouldn't have made my point. I want all of Victoria to please, PLEASE just STOP the bloody beeping!

And, as a last gripe, there is little to no courtesy in this city. Noone wants to stop for 3 seconds to let someone in front of them. In Bristol, where I lived for the past 14 years, some people were arseholes, but everyone let everyone else go in front of them. Always. Yes there was road rage, but there was also courtesy. I'm afraid that this is something I just do not see in this small city. Apparently Canadians are soooo "nice". Not when they're in their cars baby. I'll tell you that. 

I think I'll stick to biking.

We recently bought an electric Bike, and are in the process of souping it up so that Pickle can sit in the back. She has now got a seat, a box to put her bits and pieces in, a rain cover that protects her from all sides, and now, she's got twinkly Christmas lights. She's a lucky kid. 

I love to bike through the city with her, despite the freezing cold fingers and toes. It sure beats having to deal with all those "nice" Canadian car drivers!

Whinge over! 

Thanks for reading x